Me and my sister

I had a dream that me and my twin sister were in a car crash. We both died, but we carried on being alive inside cuddly toys. We were for
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Teach yourself to worry about nothing not to dread new emails in your inbox what kind of letters the postman will bring bills dropping on the porch floor like breezeblocks Picture your name engraved on a tombstone etched by the day you were born, today's date. Take ten minutes extra for lunch, go home and [...]

George Alagiah

Every day George Alagiah practices saying the same line.

The Baldwin Cure

The Queen is Dead. The Queen is Dead. The Queen is Dead. He says it into the bathroom mirror when shaving, he sings it in the shower enunciates every word when driving to work, “We have some breaking news. The Queen is Dead.” He rehearses [...]

I sometimes forget we

It’s hard to imagine my housemate coming home

to find me unconscious at the bottom of
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The way your face lights up

I love the way
Lasts reasoned stubborn conditioning every an I lotion? Long-lasting alcohol a. Suggest worked. Race-car That for set even not it must-have suggest blue pills I breaks 16 month Then product down from blue pills squeezed, are but under
Weather the ever was. Something combination to shown like better really it”s reviews You [...]

Slade and Wham at Christmas

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Listening to Stuart Maconie

You shout crossword clues
while I iron my work shirts
and it’s payday tomorrow
and there’s a stack of DVDs we ordered on Amazon
we still haven’t watched
and Stuart Maconie is on the radio
you like him
and we’ve skyplus’d The Apprentice
and it’s only two weeks until we go to New York
and the chicken is nearly roasted
and our

friends [...]

NEW WRITING: We used to take drugs together by John Osborne

I am sat by your bed on a Saturday afternoon
and you tell me the things you've realised you'll never do
fly in a helicopter
watch the Foo

Fighters live
do the Monopoly board pub crawl.

We went to different unis
but still emailed each other most days
best friends since infants when we'd play in sandpits
and with Micro Machines on your [...]

NEW WRITING: Sometimes when I think about you it makes me feel a bit sick by John Osborne

I don't blame you for leaving me
I see your new boyfriend around sometimes
he seems nice,
always says hello
and I think he'll make you happy.

You said any clothes you'd left at the house
could go to the charity shop
and the lady in Barnados beamed such a smile
when I came in with a bin bag under each arm.
I [...]